Wow, what can I say and where do I start?
I’m a 50 year old woman who wishes she was a 10 year-old girl. I imagine what it would be like to go back 40 years and not be responsible…
– for a mortgage payment,
– for paying for my health insurance,
– for continuously making meals for myself,
– for paying for my car care and car insurance,
– for raising income so that the organization I work for doesn’t have to discontinue any programming, and God forbid, let anyone go,
– for having to sit in on hours of calls trying to determine what our best strategy is in this crisis and then having to pivot every three days because it changes,
– for managing a team of people people through an ‘unprecedented’ time in this country, and not being able to give them answers,
– taking my animals to the vet and paying for their medication and treatment,
– for the health and welfare of my mom, who is in the highest risk age range for COVID-19.
And, not for worrying…
– about what I eat (or drink) and packing the weight on,
– about whether I will have enough money for retirement,
– about my age and if I lose my job, finding one that is competitive to the experience, knowledge-required and salary that I make,
– about how to safely get groceries without contacting COVID 19,
– about whether I am doing enough to help my ‘neighbor’ during this time, or anytime, and, I could go on and on.
I know 10 year-olds do not have it easy right now either. However, I fantasize about a time when life was a little easier and I was oblivious to what was going on in the world. As the band Slade sang, I just want to “Run Runaway“.
Someone said to me last week, “a time like this brings out the best and the worst in people”. I tend to agree with that. I have tremendous admiration and respect for the courageous and authentic leadership I have seen this past month. I have seen it in my community, in my workplace, in my state and admiring it from a far, in New York. (Side note: I have a secret crush on Dr. Fauci – he’s been a reassuring and authentic leader.) I have heard voices crack and shake from leaders with the heartfelt emotion for the grief and sadness being experienced at at this time.
Recently, on a national call, one of the senior leaders from the organization I work for said, “I just want to give my mom a hug”. When I heard that it surprised me. I appreciated the vulnerability be shown and and thought, me too, I just want one simple thing – I just want to hug my mom.
Be well and stay well.
