This blog was originally published in September 2010 and updated April 2019.
People usually ask me “how did you come up with the idea for SheTaxi?” SheTaxi
has been a concept evolving in my head for the past few years. Like a lot of
people who experience a life altering event and then “find themselves,” that is
how it started for me.
At age 35, I found out that I had thyroid cancer. (If you’re going to have cancer,
that is the best one to get. It’s curable and the survival rates are very high.)
Regardless, I do not have a history of cancer in my family, so I was quite a
surprise to hear it; which started me on a journey.
I began assessing my life. What was working, what wasn’t working and how did I
want to live my life? I had been through a lot of experiences, more than one
person should go through in their lifetime. Some of these I brought on myself and
others were put on me.
I was exhausted. I was so tired of being me. I focused on what I wanted, instead
of what I had. I created more pain in my life because I was used to it and was
surrounded by people who were not good for me. I thought of my lump of cancer
as my ball of s*i*. I was angry and decided - this is it - no more. I have the
opportunity to live the last half of my life with authenticity, peace and grace. Let’s
figure this out.
I began dedicating a lot of time to personal development work. I was reading
books by motivational authors, biographies from individuals who inspired
me and listening daily to motivational podcasts. One common element began to
emerge from these resources - they all valued and cared for their mind, body and
spirit, something that had been severely lacking in my life.
Eventually, I made a commitment to take small steps each week to care for an
element of my mind, my body and my spirit. After spending a lifetime having a
very difficult time establishing healthier habits, this was the first time the changes
began to stick. I moved at a pace that fit me, was kind to myself, refrained from
judgment and lived “should-free”. I learned how to take better care of myself.
During the course of three years, I lost 60 pounds, reduced my anxiety, handled
stress better, increased my physical activity, made healthier food choices and
FELT BETTER. I got to the point that was able to walk by a mirror with criticizing
myself.. I was finally starting to like me. My well-being journey was working.
Fast forward to April 2019.
Here I am today, feeling very much like I did before I started my well-being
journey. I really don’t like myself. I’ve gained a ton of weight. My self-esteem is
feeling beaten down and I’m tired, and tired of being me, again!
The past few years have been rough. I had some significant life experiences that
impacted me emotionally. As a result, I started to back-slide in my self-care. I
started going back to old habits that I had for years that hurt me, rather than
soothed me. I have also done a wonderful job of “beating myself up” on all of this,
which has helped fuel the self-sabotaging behaviors again.
The biggest lesson I learned from the past few years is that I let my connection
with other people, who too struggled with self-care, go. If I had stayed connected
to the women who could relate to the ups and downs of daily life, I would have
treated myself much, much better. Instead, I retreated, went inward and checked out.
That said, I’m back and ready to start the well-being journey again. I know this a
life-long journey. Much like someone who is fighting an addiction, I need to stay
connected to people who are on the same road as me. There may be days that
are better than others, but I know that if I keep the Road to Well-Being by my
side, along with the great community of women who are on the same journey, I
am headed in the right direction.
So, that is why I created SheTaxi - because I want women to feel better and to
live healthier and happier lives.