Every day in the last few weeks has given me time to pause and reflect on my life: my family, friendships, what matters to me.
I’ve had enough meaningful conversations in the last few weeks to last a lifetime.
Last year, two of my very closest friends-Curt and Denise died, just weeks apart.
One around Thanksgiving and one around Christmas.
They were my people.
Two other dear friends lost their husbands-men who loved them unconditionally.
2019 was the hardest year ever-too much to handle.
I could barely talk about my friends because of the heartache and sadness I felt.
But there were signs that they were with me-and I want to share that with you so you can pay attention too that your loved ones are giving you signs that they are with you.
About Curt: We were friends for over 25 years. We worked together at NWA. Truly one of the very best people I knew-such a genuine, funny, caring guy. Loved by everyone.
We talked several times a week for hours. We had the deepest conversations about life, health, politics-you name it.
Sadly, we had a pause in our friendship for a few months before he died and I hadn’t talked to him for a while-then he died very suddenly.
When I talked to our friend Dave-we were the 3 amigos-I talked about my regret that I lost touch with Curt. He would do his best to console me that the years of friendship mattered more than a short period of not communicating.
Then I got a sign-I had sent Curt a text, my last one. Trying to reconcile what had happened. I never heard back.
About 10 days after his death, my phone was updating. I’ve never had this happen before-it said “Your text to Curt _ didn’t go through 256 days ago”. Then it vanished.
My last text-it never went through.
I believe this was a sign from Curt. I can not explain the meaning of this.
I cannot describe what this meant to me. It gave me some peace.
My friend Denise-she was like a sister to me. We lived just a few blocks apart in Seattle.
The weekend before Christmas, just as I was getting ready to host a group of friends for brunch, my friend Felicia called.
Denise had died-no apparent cause of death.
To say this rocked me is an understatement.
How could two of my best friends die so close to each other?
While I was taking in this news, 3 red cardinals were outside my patio door flying around.
They were around all weekend too.
I believe in the signs of red cardinals as symbolizing your loved ones are with you. And I believe these were my dad, Curt and Denise.
On Christmas Eve, I was leaving my mom’s house after having an emotional conversation that included talking about Curt and Denise.
I was in my sister’s room and turned around and there was this bag on her chair. “I am Blessed”.
I said to Anne, “Where did that come from?” She didn’t remember seeing it before that night.
My best friend from college, Ann D, had died tragically in a boating accident two years ago.
I helped her and her business partner with their small business years ago. She gave me this bag as a thank you.
I don’t remember bringing that bag to my mom’s house-but clearly I did.
I felt Ann’s presence that night-it was her sign.
I’ll end with-I’m a private person. I don’t put much about me personally on Facebook.
Lots of dog pictures, mostly.
But I believe this time is meant for us to pause, reflect and act so we can do better.
I’ve talked to a number of St. Kate’s alums in the last two weeks and they ask such meaningful questions. Our conversations are deep and personal.
I take this as my sign that I can share a little more of myself that maybe can resonate with what’s going on in your lives.
So look for the signs-they are there.
Meet the Author
Mary Jacobs is founder of The Women’s Excelerator. Mary is a strategist, educator and consultant who has a passion for working with women entrepreneurs. Her focus is on sales strategies for launching and building sustainable businesses for women starting professional service firms. Learn more about Mary at www.thewomensexcelerator.com.